Out of respect and agony on this day, my profound gratitude to those who serve and have served our nation. To those who lost family and friends, an absolutely dreadful day. I am so sorry. People (my husband included) choose to put their life on the line every day for our protection and freedom. We remember that horrific day on September 11, 2001 and we mourn and grieve, but we do not fear.
There is no transition from that, so let me be quite frank in the delivery of today's subject. Hugging. I am not a natural hugger, not one bit. I get a bit awkward 1/2 the time I'm hugged and usually hug out of habit rather than actual desire. But oh my goodness if we only do the things we are comfortable with. A few months back, my sweet mom listened to my tears of frustration. I stood before her, sobbing because I couldn't seem to handle my life. (related: trying to be in complete control of life DOES NOT WORK). I stood there and gave up. She said Nothing. Not a thing. She walked over to me, opened her arms up wide and embraced me like I was her baby.
(lol that I was)
It changed me, that hug. I felt it in my toes. It let me surrender and gave me the security that I am okay. Me, in my mess, standing here and crying is okay. In fact, it's beautiful. A hug does that, it's disarming. Believe me, if someone doesn't love you they won't move in and hug embrace you in your shiz. They will run for the hills. Caution: these are not your people. The people who you can crumble into, the ones who will hold you and rub your back and remind you of who you are. THESE ARE YOUR PEOPLE.
Also, most people won't be your people, and that's okay. Know who they are so you can run to them. A few who will cry on the floor with you, these are the gems.
Back to hugging. I took note of my mothers love and literally wrote down in my journal the following sentiment:
THE HUG IS SO DANG POWERFUL
It's true. I kinda hate it because I'm a weirdo, but I also love it because sometimes a hug is a whole lot easier than trying to find the correct thing to say.
Rewind to last week. Strangers at the playground, her and I; kiddos climbing and swinging. Tears and frustration as my new friend deals with something SO challenging. Overwhelmed and wanting to give up, weary and tired. What I did next was maybe more for me than her. I hugged her tight. She bawled and I felt brave and strong but also so, so together. Our embrace stood for non judgment. It stood for "me too." It represented not alone and you are heard. For that moment there in the dirt, our souls were in it together. I felt what she felt and was able to take a bit of her load onto myself; just like my mom did for me. I know my load was significantly lighter after my mom's embrace that late morning.
So don't get cray, or do..but I think the world could use a little more hugging. A little more "we're in this together, not against each other." A little more arms reached out, open and kind. A hug unifies and teaches. It's raw and messy and sometimes odd, but holy heavens if it isn't powerful.