Five Hard Truths
The words jumped off the page, I grabbed my journal and scribbled in orange marker.
Here they are, the words I have been searching for.
Life has been hard lately. Our family has gone through loss of things and people we really love. Friends have babies who are fighting for their lives, family moved far away, job promotions fell through, cancer left a family broken.
These words spilled beauty and depth over my soul.
Richard Rohr, 5 Hard Truths That Will Set You Free.
1. Life is hard
2. Your life is not about you
3. You are not in control
4. You are not that important
5. You are going to die
Five truth bombs that hit me nice and harsh at first and then began slowly setting me free. Like water in the desert, these truths are bringing me refreshment and new perspective.
Life is hard. I say this 489 times a day, to myself and to my babies. Life is SO hard and accepting that will free us to see the beauty. This doesn't mean, suck it up. This is validation to feel it all. If we keep trying to make life easy and comfortable, we will be overly exhausted and never satisfied.
Life is not about you. What a relief. My 20 year old self would probably disagree. Yes, we are important, I believe each of us have a unique purpose. I also think our culture tells us WE matter the most and I think this is an absolute lie. Accepting our humanity and that life is not here to make us happy will take the pressure off and give you permission to live.
You are not in control. Alright, let's skip this one! Ha! Definitely still letting this truth saturate as I continue to let go (having small children helps/doesn't help). This one is hard, but as I live each day, I hope to surrender and understand that loosening my grip trumps micromanaging. More wonder and brilliance is experienced as detachment and differentiation increases.
You are not that important. This one is my favorite truth. I get SO hung up on personal life details and this has assisted in true freedom living. It gives me strength to serve others, forgive others and myself, to open my eyes wide and see the world. To embrace my faults and flaws and strengths and move on.
You are going to die.
I was first struck by this concept years ago while reading Tuesdays with Morrie,
“Everyone knows they're going to die, but nobody believes it.... So we kid ourselves about death.... But there's a better approach. To know you're going to die, and to be prepared for it at any time....Do what the Buddhists do...ask, Is today the day? Am I ready? Am I doing all I need to do? Am I being the person I want to be?”
Mitch Albom Tuesdays with Morrie
To know you are going to die is something rarely discussed. Not that I really want to sit around and chat about it over tea, but it feels like a taboo subject for most. However, the truth is there and living with the end in mind seems to be what the wisest do. Death is hard for me, turning away is more comfortable, still on my journey ; )
There is a part of me that hates this list. For most of my life I lived in a dream world, disconnected from consequence, understanding and perspective. When life was hard, I would buy a new dress and "move on." In hopes of growing deeper roots and thriving in freedom, pressing into the hard is the only way.
I wonder if any of these truths resonate with you?
Be free, my friends.
(I do not know much about Richard Rohr, I came across this list while reading Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Peter Scazzero)